Thoughts and Prayers for Today

This morning, after doing my Bible Study, I stopped by my friend Becky's blog.  It was a beautiful follow-up to this morning's readings.  So thanks for that, Becky.

Things have been a bit ca-ray-zay here lately, so I've fallen off of the blog-reading-wagon.  When I was on ol' B-Dizzle's blog I gravitated towards another post of her's from January.

I don't know what it is that drew me to that particular post.  Could it have been the title?

If You Read Only One Post of Mine, Make it this One

Nah.  Doesn't really grab you does it?  Don't you just kind of get the feeling that you could read it...or not...?

Okay, no.  I didn't get that feeling.  So I read it.  It has reopened my eyes to a tragic reality that must return to my daily prayers and consciousness.  I've known about this, but have known about a lot of things, and in my prayers, sometimes specificity takes a backseat to me saying "Listen God, we all pretty much just need you down here on Earth, and badly, so thanks for anything that you can do."

Becky's blog post that day was about the atrocious reality of human trafficking.  It really hit me.  I followed links from her post and found another blog to follow.  That blog is called stopredlights.com.  Also an organization to look into called Tiny Hands International.

Okay, if I keep going on like this I'm just going to end up posting all the same links that Becky did...so if you haven't already, please read that post of hers and check out those links (some are on my page but more are on hers).

Anyway, I found something on stopredlights.com that I felt compelled to share here on my blog.  It's a video.  And all I ask of you is that if you have two minutes and fifty-three seconds to spare, please watch it, consider it, and pray.  Please.  Pray.

I couldn't say it any better than Becky did:

"Praying is never just 'the least' we can do...  It's the most we can do..."

Today, and from now on, I am making a conscious choice and effort to pray for those who are enslaved by the terrors of human trafficking and for the young people, teenagers (and others) of our world who are, many of them, suffering (frequently in silence).


Stay Classy...but above all, stay in prayer,
LT

I Dropped the Ball on Dropping my Nets

This morning, I already had a Bible Study related blog post planned out...but I've decided to drop that, at least for the time being, and just go with the flow.

So this morning...I was doing my Bible Study and found myself in Matthew 4.  While I was roaming around in good ol' chapter 4, I ran into that story that I know by heart, the one where Simon Peter, Andrew, James, and John run into Jesus when they're out on the waves, doing their jobs...and at the simplest invitation from Jesus these dudes are like "Forget this gig...I'm going to go fish for people instead!"

In case anyone is unfamiliar with this story...or has read my paraphrased version and is left wanting...here's the NLT version.

Matthew 4 

18 One day as Jesus was walking along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers—Simon, also called Peter, and Andrew—throwing a net into the water, for they fished for a living. 19 Jesus called out to them, “Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!” 20 And they left their nets at once and followed him.

21 A little farther up the shore he saw two other brothers, James and John, sitting in a boat with their father, Zebedee, repairing their nets. And he called them to come, too.22 They immediately followed him, leaving the boat and their father behind.

So that's the deal with the first disciples.  In the present...when we read this...or at least when I read this...I think: "well, duh!  It's Jesus!  I mean, yeah, they're leaving everything that they know, everything that they've worked for, and everyone that they love...but...IT'S JESUS!  Who would turn down a personal invitation from the Son of God?!"

Anyway, for those of you who know me...when I say something like..."I think," and then there's a quote following...there's a lot more to it, but seriously, who wants to read absolutely EVERYTHING that I think?  I know I don't.

Anyway...yes looking back, it seems obvious that the right thing for them to do is just drop their nets and go.

I apologize...this is a scattered blog post.

But it's not just about dropping our nets, now is it?  No.  There's more to it.  It's kind of like the "Bend and Snap" maneuver from Legally Blonde.  (Okay...no it's not really like that at all...but when you can tie in a really goofy movie...not to mention a really goofy movie that was turned into a guilty pleasure musical...how can you pass it up?)

Okay...so dropping our nets is like the "Bend and Snap" (oooh, I'm making another connection, prepare yourselves).  Ir's a process with steps.

1.  Drop your Nets.
2.  Take those newly empty/unoccupied hands and grab on to Jesus.

Side note...this is kind of where the next connection came from.  So when I was reading this passage, I thought of the following song.



...and the words really hit me.

If You say go, we will go

If You say wait, we will wait

If You say step out on the water

And they say it can't be done

We'll fix our eyes on You and we will come

Your ways are higher than our ways

And the plans that You have laid

Are good and true

If You call us to the fire

You will not withdraw Your hand

We'll gaze into the flames and look for You

When I was younger...I did my own personal net dropping.  I had plans for my life.  My initial plans were thwarted...so I came up with new ones.  But then I felt Jesus telling me to drop those nets.  And I did.  I dropped my plans, grabbed onto Jesus, and basically told him that I was along for the ride and He could take me wherever He saw fit.

But then I found myself in Indianapolis.  And at times...more often than not...I was very unhappy.  I think that I frequently felt abandoned.  I wondered why, when I had given up my former plans to follow the plans that God had for me...when I moved 160 miles away from everyone that I knew and loved...I wondered why I wasn't getting it.  Why would God lead me away and then step out of the picture?  I had plans already...and knew how to achieve them.  These were not my plans...these were His plans...and how was I supposed to figure out what they were and how to fulfill them on my own?!

Ah yes...there is the key..."on my own."  I was playing the role of Eponine in my own life...(if you don't know Les Miserables...get the soundtrack from the library and listen to it...or youtube it I guess...but you should really hear the whole thing)...singing the song "On My Own" with every breath that I breathed and every step that I took.

I felt alone...but I was never alone.

I thought I was suffering for God...but in reality...I was suffering by my own hand.

I dropped my nets, grabbed onto Jesus, felt alone, and slowly but surely loosened my grip on the Lord.  It was, of course, not God who stepped away...it was me.  I didn't gaze into the flames and look for the Lord...I saw the flames, remembered how "certain" things seemed for me before God lit His fire in my heart...and I felt as if I were alone in a burning house.

I have come to the conclusion that this is more like "Wash, Rinse, and Repeat."

1.  Drop your nets.

2.  Grap onto Jesus.

3.  HOLD ON TO JESUS.

4.  Repeat.

Maybe it's inevitable that we will continue to pick up new nets along the way...but each net that we grab on to takes up space and time.  It's good to know though, that if we've dropped our nets before, we can always do it again.

I think that I always looked at my net dropping as the end of a story.

"Well here's what I wanted to do...but I gave it up for God...The End."

Pretty backwards.

It's a beginning...just like it was for the Disciples.

"I had plans.  Human plans.  Unenlightened plans.  Then I dropped them, as they were no longer needed, and followed Jesus Christ.  I dropped my plans...my nets...and I picked up my life."

That's all for now, guys.  Peace, Love and Happiness!

SC,

LT

"Noah and Friends" or "God and Loneliness"

Genesis 6:9, 17-18


9 This is the account of Noah and his family.  Noah was a righteous man, the only blameless person living on earth at the time, and he walked in close fellowship with God.


17 "Look!  I am about to cover the earth with a flood that will destroy every living thing that breathes.  Everything on earth will die.  18  But I will confirm my covenant with you.  So enter the boat - you and your wife and your sons and their wives.


I feel as if this passage can show us that loneliness, grief, and loss are very real feelings.

There is being alone...and then there is being lonely.

When God created Adam, the Lord saw that things were good, but there was still room for more goodness.  God then created Eve, a counterpart to Adam, with whom Adam could share life and creation.

Later, when God's creations took a turn for the worse, there was one blameless person in the whole world.  The Bible tells us that Noah was that person.  And yet, God saves not only him, but also his wife, their sons, and their sons' wives from the flood as well.

The Bible does not tell us that Noah's family is blameless.  But still they are saved.  Why is this?

Is this because God did not want Noah to be lonely?  I think yes.

But God has already created Adam and Eve "from scratch," if you will, could he not do the same for Noah and create for him a new wife?  I think yes.  I believe that God can do absolutely anything.

But that's not what God did.

God saved the blameless and the blameworthy.

Is this because God not only did not want loneliness for Noah, but also loss and grief?  Could be.

(I think that this also shows us that we needn't be perfect specimens to be saved by are Great Lord.)

I believe that God understands loneliness and does not want it for us.  If we believe in Him, trust in Him, follow Him, and allow ourselves to be fully, deeply, and unabashedly loved by our God, I believe that he will lead us to a place where loneliness does not exist.

Identity Crisis By Proxy

Fear not, gentle readers.  There is absolutely no crisis at hand.  But when a catchy title smacks you in the face like this one did to me...you just mustn't pass that opportunity up.  Plus it's a four word title.  Bumper day for me!

Actually, side note...bumper day for both Genevieve and myself.

I digress...and I don't care...on with the digression.

Long day for me.  Not bad altogether, just long.  Got home from babysitting just in time to walk Genevieve before it got dark outside.  (Is it just me...or should we have fallen back two hours for DST?  I never really cared until I had a dog to walk!)  It must be said, that babysitting was not a long part to my long day.  It was too short of a time to hang out with too wonderful of a kid.

Karl is so awesome.  He is the three-year-old son of my former boss (in an arena other than babysitting) and his wife.  I don't know how to explain it other than by saying that they are simply one of the most pleasant families that I know.  Gus and Mary are both so very unique and beautiful individuals and they have passed that along to Karl.  Karl and I get along famously.  He thinks pretty much everything that I say is hilarious.  And I say a lot of things.  Our only moment of "disagreement" today came from me trying to explain to him that no matter how many times he asked me, the tan pencil was still the tan pencil and the turquoise pencil was still the turquoise pencil.  Our little back and forth bit about these colors brought laughs to at least half of the other people in the lab (my other work).

Anyway, now I've digressed from my digression.  Got home.  Walked Genevieve and got back just as the sun was setting.  I'll tell you what...walking your favorite dog under a pink sky has got to be one of the best things in the world.  We went to Petsmart to get Genevieve a very specific toy that I have been researching and just knew she would love.  Incidentally, she couldn't care less about it.  However, I got her two toys today, and the spur of the moment purchase...I don't think she's ever loved anything more in her entire life!

I swear to God I did not pose this.  Genevieve does not pose...she does things her way.

So anyway...that was the bumper part of the day for Genevieve.  Mine was a cookies and cream milk shake from Chick-Fil-A.



So when we were on our walk, I met a man who asked me what kind of a dog she was.  I replied that she was a cross between a German Shepherd and a Chinese Shar-Pei.  The man said "Oh, she kinda looks like a Belgian Shepherd with that black snout."

I forgot about this until I sat down just now to do some Bible study.  And of course...me being me...I had to look up Belgian Shepherds.  I had never heard of them.

What do they look like, you may ask?  Well friends, they look like Genevieve.

Belgian Shepherd

German Shepherd

Oh no!  What do I do?  I don't know every single fact!  Luckily...it doesn't matter.  (Yes...I'm going to get all cheesy now...so if you want to stop reading...do so...just know that I'm judging you.)

I love my dog.  Genevieve is awesome.  I don't care what kind of a dog she is.  She's my dog.  She's got my back.  She's waiting for me when I get home from classes.  She's waiting foor me when I get home from work.  She's at my feet while I'm cooking dinner (no, I do not throw her scraps, she just loves me, so there).  She's laying in my bed...at two in the morning when I'm trying to pull an all-nighter, finishing a scale model of my set or a costume rendering...reminding me that maybe...just maybe...sleep might be a better idea.

Speaking of that...I was getting to my Bible study early...to go to bed early...to get sleep.  Then I just thought "Oh, that's right, I should look up what Belgian Shepherds look like!"  Those digressions will really get to you...especially when you digress from them.

But I digress.

Leviticus will not read itself.

Stay classy everyone!

Peace,

LT

Cranberry Oatmeal and the 56th Psalm

This morning, I have substituted 1/4 cup cranberry juice for 1/4 cup (out of 1 1/2 cups) water in making my oatmeal.  It definitely gives it a new taste.  I haven't decided yet if it's good or bad...but I am eating it.

Anyway, I'll level with you all.  Honesty is key, right?  My Congenital Myasthenia Gravis has really been beating me up lately.  It's just really frustrating...because I want to live!  But in all honesty, I feel guilty for being frustrated, because yes, while to say that IT SUCKS trying to get through college with this asinine disease would be a gross understatement, it also seems foolish to say so.  Why?  I'll tell you why.

Because the odds have always been against me.  This isn't a pity party...just a fact fiesta (wow...not gonna lie...that was clever).  I wasn't supposed to live.  Then I wasn't supposed to walk.  I wasn't supposed to make it through school or even be able to try to go to college, honestly.  But I'm here.  I'm doing it.  I'm doing it very slowly, yes, but I'm doing it.

Sometimes (okay, no...always) it is hard for me to remember that there is a line between doing my best and being the best.


And that's kind of where I am at right now, I think.  I don't know.  It's just disheartening to me that doing my best isn't always going to be the best.  It makes me feel even more behind everyone else than I really am, I think.

Sometimes I don't know who my worst enemy is.  You know the famous adage "I am my own worst enemy"?  Lots of times I think that I am that way.  But here's the thing.  My whole life I have been trying to live in the mindset that I am not my disease and my disease is not me.  So this genetic defect that is always trying to keep me down...that is not who I am....  So is the genetic defect my worst enemy?  Or is my mental/emotional/spiritual struggle with that defect my worst enemy?  And if so...is that struggle me? Am I that struggle?  I don't think so.  I hope not.  I don't want to be defined by what's wrong with me.

I'm pretty blessed to not have armies or angry people swearing to kill me.  I'm not persecuted in that way.  (This is my attempt at a segue.)  But I've always been fighting against my body to do what I want.  And this shell that I live in has been doing its best to hold me back for 23 years.  So in a sense...I feel persecuted by myself...but involuntarily...if that makes any sense.  Anyway...when I was eating my oatmeal (actually I have yet to finish it) I read this Psalm which gave me some hope or insight or comfort or something like those things.

Psalm 56

Trust in God under Persecution

To the leader:  according to The Dove on far-off Terebinths.  Of David.

A Miktam, when the Philistines seized him in Gath.

Be gracious to me, O God, for people trample on me;

all day long foes oppress me;

my enemies trample on me all day long,

for many fight against me.

O Most High, when I am afraid,

I put my trust in you.

In God, whose word I praise,

in God I trust; I am not afraid;

what can flesh do to me?

All day long they seek to injure my cause;

all their thoughts are against me for evil.

They stir up strife, they lurk,

they watch my steps.

As they hoped to have my life,

so repay them for their crime;

in wrath cast down the peoples,

O God!

You have kept count of my tossings;

put my tears in your bottle.

Are they not in your record?

Then my enemies will retreat

in the day when I call.

This I know, that God is for me.

In God, whose word I praise,

in the Lord, whose word I praise,

in God I trust; I am not afraid.

What can a mere mortal do to me?

My vows to you I must perform, O God;

I will render thank offerings to you.

For you have delivered my soul from death,

and my feet from falling,

so that I may walk before God

in the light of life.

All that I can say is thank you Lord for Your Word, Your guidance, and Your Son...all of which take this life of mine and make it mean something, turning my burdens into opportunities to seek You further.

Well of course, that's not all I can say...but the following is not about Psalm...

I can also say that my cranberry oatmeal experiment was probably a one time only deal.  Not sure it's good.  Also, it is now cold.  I will finish it now, and continue on with my day as best as I can.  My plan is not to fight against my body (it is doing what it is doing for some reason) but to Stand with the Lord.

Peace and Blessings to you all on this Tuesday.

Stay Classy,

LT